Copy of `Effing Pot - London slang glossary`

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Effing Pot - London slang glossary Category: History and Culture Date & country: 22/09/2013, UK Words: 234

I'm easy
This expression means I don't care or it's all the same to me. Not to be confused with how easy it is to lure the person into bed!

U
A letter used far more in British. It is in words like colour, favour, labour etc. I think this is why UK keyboards have 102 characters on them instead of your 101, or is it because they have a pound sign on them?

Yakking
This means talking incessantly

Yonks
Blimey, I haven't heard from you for yonks. If you heard someone say that it would mean that they had not seen you for ages!

Zed
The last letter of the alphabet. The English hate saying zee and only relent with names such as ZZ Top (Zed Zed Top does sound a bit stupid!).

C of E
The Church of England. Our official protestant church

Wonky
If something is shaky or unstable you might say it is wonky. For example I changed my chair in a restaurant recently because I had a wonky one.

Wank
This is the verb to describe the action a wanker participates in.

Waz
On average, it seems that for every pint of lager you need to go for a waz twice! A complete waste of time in a serious drinking session. It means wee or pee.

Whinge
Whingers are not popular in any circumstance. To whinge is to whine. We all know someone who likes to whinge about everything.

Waffle
To waffle means to talk on and on about nothing. It is not something you eat. Americans often think that Brits waffle on about the weather. The truth of course is that our news reports last 60-120 seconds and the weather man is not hyped up to be some kind of superstar as he is on the TV in the US. If you want to see an example of real waffle watch the weather channel in Texas where there is nothing to talk about other than it is hot and will remain so for the next 6 months. Another example is the ladies who waffle on about anything on the Home Shopping Network. They would probably be classed as professional wafflers!

Wangle
Some people have all the luck. I know some people that can wangle anything; upgrades on planes, better rooms in hotels. You know what I mean.

Uni
Short for university, we would say we went to uni like you would say you went to school. School here is just for kids.

Wacky backy
This is the stuff in a joint, otherwise known as pot or marijuana!

Twat
Another word used to insult someone who has upset you. Also means the same as fanny but is less acceptable in front of your grandmother, as this refers to parts of the female anatomy. Another use for the same word is to twat something, which would be to hit it hard. Get it right or I'll twat you over the head!

Twee
Twee is a word you would generally hear older people say. It means dainty or quaint. A bit like the way you chaps think of England I suppose.

Two finger salute
When you see a Brit stick up two fingers at you in a V shape, he may be ordering two of something (if his palms are toward you). The other way around and it's an insult along the lines of your one finger salute. Which, by the way, is very popular here now too!

Totty
If a chap is out looking for totty, he is looking for a nice girl to chat up. There is an Italian football player called Totti

Toodle pip
This is an old expression meaning goodbye. However, I only hear it when Americans are doing impressions of Brits as it has fallen into disuse, along with steam trains and gas lights.

Tool
Yet another word for your willy or penis. You'd think we were obsessed.

Tosser
This is another word for wanker and has exactly the same meaning and shares the same hand signal. Unfortunately my house in Texas was in Tossa Lane, which was a problem when telling older members of the family where to write to me!

Tidy
Apart from the obvious meaning of neat, tidy also means that a woman is a looker, attractive or sexy.

Todger
As if we don't have enough of them already, this is yet another word for your willy, or penis.

Taking the biscuit
If something really takes the biscuit, it means it out-does everything else and cannot be bettered. Some places in America they said takes the cake.

Talent
Talent is the same as totty. Checking out the talent means looking for the sexy young girls (or boys I suppose).

Throw a spanner in the works
This is an expression that means to wreck something.

Tickety-boo
If something is going well with no problems we would say it is tickety-boo.

Table
We use this word in exactly the opposite way. To us a motion is tabled when it is brought to the table, or suggested for consideration. You table a motion when it is left for a later date.

Swotting
Swotting means to study hard, the same as cram does. Before exams we used to swot, not that it made any difference to some of us. If you swotted all the time, you would be called a swot

Stiffy
Yet another word for erection.

Strop
If someone is sulking or being particularly miserable you would say they are being stroppy or that they have a strop on. I heard an old man on the train tell his wife to stop being a stroppy cow.

Suss
If you heard someone saying they had you sussed they would mean that they had you figured out! If you were going to suss out something it would mean the same thing.

Splash out
If you splash out on something

Squidgy
A chocolate cream cake would be squidgey. It means to be soft and, well, squidgey!

Squiffy
This means you are feeling a little drunk. Some people also use it to mean that something has gone wrong.

Starkers
Avoid being seen starkers when visiting England. It means stark naked.

Snookered
If you are snookered it means you are up the famous creek without a paddle. It comes from the game of snooker where you are unable to hit the ball because the shot is blocked by your opponent's ball.

Sod all
If you are a waiter in America and you serve a family of Brits, the tip is likely to be sod all or as you would call it

Sod's law
This is another name for Murphy's law

Spend a penny
To spend a penny is to go to the bathroom. It is a very old fashioned expression that still exists today. It comes from the fact that in ladies loos you used to operate the door by inserting an old penny.

Smart
When we say someone is smart, we are talking about the way they are dressed

Smashing
If something is smashing, it means it is terrific.

Snog
If you are out on the pull you will know you are succeeding if you end up snogging someone of the opposite sex (or same sex for that matter!). It would probably be referred to as making out in American, or serious kissing!

Sloshed
Yet another way to describe being drunk. Clearly we need a lot of ways to describe it since getting plastered is a national pastime.

Slapper
A slapper is a female who is a bit loose. A bit like a slag or a tart. Probably also translates into tramp in American.

Slash
Something a lager lout might be seen doing in the street after his curry

Slag
To slag someone off, is to bad mouth them in a nasty way. Usually to their face.

Sixes and sevens
If something is all at sixes and sevens then it is in a mess, topsy turvy or somewhat haywire!

Skew-whiff
This is what you would call crooked. Like when you put a shelf up and it isn't straight we would say it is all skew-whiff.

Skive
To skive is to evade something. When I was a kid we used to skive off school on Wednesdays instead of doing sports. We always got caught of course, presumably because the teachers used to do the same when they were fourteen!

Shufti
Pronounced shooftee, this means to take a look at something, to take a butchers! It's an old Arabic word, picked up by British soldiers during World War II, in North Africa.

Shirty
Don't get shirty with me young man was what my Dad used to tell me when I was little. He was referring to my response to his telling off for doing some terrible little boy thing. Like tying my brother to the back of Mum's car or putting my shoes in the toilet. It meant I was getting bad tempered.

Shite
This is just another way of saying shit. It is useful for times when you don't want to be overly rude as it doesn't sound quite as bad!

Shitfaced
If you hear someone saying that they got totally shitfaced it means they were out on the town and got steaming drunk. Normally attributed to stag nights or other silly events.

Shagged
Past tense of shag, but also see knackered.

Shambles
If something is a shambles it is chaotic or a real mess. It's also a very old name for a slaughterhouse. So if you ever visit The Shambles in York, then the name does not refer to the somewhat shambolic nature of the buildings; it's a reference to the site it's built on

Shambolic
In a state of chaos. Generally heard on the news when the government is being discussed!

Scrummy
This is a word that would be used to describe either some food that was particularly good (and probably sweet and fattening).

Scrumping
To go stealing

Send-up
To send someone up is to make fun of them. Or if something is described as being a send-up it is equivalent to your take-off. Like Robin Williams does a take-off on the British accent

Shag
Same as bonk but slightly less polite. At seventies parties watch the look of surprise on the Englishman's face when an American girl asks him if he would like to shag. Best way to get a Brit to dance that I know! You can even go to shagging classes!

Right
I'm feeling right knackered. That would mean you were feeling very tired.

Rubbish
The stuff we put in the bin. Trash or garbage to you. You might also accuse someone of talking rubbish.

Rumpy pumpy
Another word for hanky panky, or a bit of nookie! Something two consenting adults get up to in private! Theoretically!

Sack/sacked
If someone gets the sack it means they are fired. Then they have been sacked. I can think of a few people I'd like to sack!

Read
If someone asks you what you read at university, they mean what was your major at school.

Redundancy
If you are made redundant it means you are laid off.

Reverse the charges
When you want to ring someone up and you have no money you can call the operator and ask to reverse the charges in the UK. In the US you would call collect.

Quite
When used alone, this word means the same as absolutely!

Rat arsed
Yet another term for drunk, sloshed or plastered. You might say loaded. In the UK, loaded is a men's magazine that covers sex and football.

Quid
A pound in money is called a quid. It is the equivalent to the buck or clam in America. A five pound note is called a fiver and a ten pound note is called a tenner.

Pull
Me and the lads used to go to the disco when we were on the pull. It means looking for birds. Of course, it works the other way round too. The ladies may also be on the pull, though probably a bit more subtly than the chaps!

Put a sock in it
This is one way of telling someone to shut up. Clearly the sock needs to be put in their loud mouth!

Put paid to
This is an expression which means to put an end to something. For example you could say that rain put paid to the cricket match, meaning it stopped play.

Prat
Yet another mildly insulting name for someone. In fact, this one is a bit ruder than pillock so you probably wouldn't say it in front of Grandma.

Puff
If a Brit starts giggling in your local drugstore

Pukka
This term has been revived recently by one of our popular young TV chefs. It means super or smashing, which of course is how he describes all his food.

Potty
This isn't just the thing you sit a toddler on

Pound sign
Ever wondered why Brits flounder when voicemail messages say to press the pound sign? What on earth is the British currency doing on a phone anyway? Well, it isn't. To a Brit, the pound sign is the wiggly thing we use to denote the UK pound (or quid), in the same way you have a dollar sign.

Porridge
Doing porridge means to serve time in prison. There was also a comedy TV series called Porridge about a prisoner starring Ronnie Barker of The Two Ronnies fame.

Posh
Roughly translates as high class, though if you look at Posh Spice there are clearly exceptions to the rule! Comes from the cabins used by the upper class on early voyages from England to India. The coolest (and most expensive cabins) were Port side on the way Out and Starboard on the way Home.

Pissed
This is a great one for misunderstanding. Most people go to the pub to get pissed. In fact the object of a stag night is to get as pissed as possible. Getting pissed means getting drunk. It does not mean getting angry. That would be getting pissed off!

Pissing around
Fooling about, in the sense of messing around or making fun or just being silly. Not terribly polite.

Plastered
Another word for loaded. In other words you have had rather too much to drink down your local. It has nothing to do with being covered with plaster though anything is possible when you are plastered.

Piece of cake
I remember saying it's a piece of cake in front of one of my American friends, who then started looking around for the cake! It means it's a cinch!

Pip pip
Another out-dated expression meaning goodbye. Not used any more.

Piss up
A piss up is a drinking session. A visit to the pub. There is an English expression to describe someone as disorganised which says that he/she could not organise a piss up in a brewery!

Pavement pizza
Well here the pavement is the sidewalk and a pavement pizza is a descriptive way of saying vomit. Often found outside Indian restaurants early on a Sunday morning.

Peanuts
I hated one of my summer jobs as a kid because it paid peanuts. The full expression is that if you pay peanuts, you get monkeys. It is a fairly derogatory way of saying that manual labour doesn't need to be bright and doesn't need a lot of pay. Typically these days peanuts means something is cheap. For example we would say the petrol in the USA is peanuts or costs peanuts. Compared to our prices it is.

Pear shaped
If something has gone pear shaped it means it has become a disaster. It might be preparing a dinner party or arranging a meeting, any of these things can go completely pear shaped.

Pants
This is quite a new expression

Parky
Either short for Michael Parkinson, a famous chat show host, or more likely a word to describe the weather as being rather cold!

On your bike
A very polite way of telling someone to f*** off.

One off
A one off is a special or a one time event that is never to be repeated. Like writing this book!

On the job
If you are on the job, it could mean that you are hard at work, or having sex. Usually the context helps you decide which it is!

On the piss
If you are out on the piss, it means you are out to get drunk, or to get pissed.

Nut
To nut someone is to head butt them. Nutting is particularly useful when at a football match.

Off colour
If someone said you were off colour they would mean that you look pale and ill! Not quite the same as something being off colour in the US!

Off your trolley
If someone tells you that you're off your trolley, it means you have gone raving bonkers, crazy, mad!

On about
What are you on about? That's something you may well hear when visiting the UK. It means what are you talking about?